Stand Staring Dumb

"It is those who have made some progress in the art of living life and in knowledge of God who stand staring dumb with wonder at the splendour of Christ. It is indeed an ill sign that we can take Him so lightly, you and I." AJ Gossip

Though I simply don't feel well today... weak, in pain, and just not WELL, I trust I don't have the ILL sign of taking Him lightly today.

I'm not taking Him lightly.

Clinging,

Su

Shackleton and Susan

I definitely don't fit into the same category as Shackleton, but today I was reminded of his group's slow, struggle, trying to cross Antarctica, "chilled to the very soul, with heads bowed low against the icy blizzards, with weak and stumbling feet, and half dead with fatigue." - A.J. Gossip

Though they never reached their goal, I loved being reminded of how the group said "Some One else was there more than they could see." As I continue to take one step forward, and two back or vice versa right now, I know that I, too, have "Some ONE else there more than I can see." Thank God for that!!

Eeyore and Me

When I was a small girl (and even not so small), I was very fond of a stuffed Winnie-the-Pooh. We were pretty inseparable. I even carried Pooh over my shoulder everywhere I went at Trout Lake Camp in northern Minnesota for a couple of summer camps.

Pooh is just impossible not to love.

On the other hand, Eeyore is a tough one to love. He is always in a bad mood. His favorite expression is "Oh, bother!"

Recently, I was given a stuffed Eeyore, and the two of us have become inseparable. Perhaps I have reverted to my childhood. Perhaps I have begun to identify with poor Eeyore more. There's a great story about him in The World of Pooh which reflects my recent muddled thinking and my confusing answers to the question, "How are you?"

"The old grey donkey, Eeyore stood by himself in a thistly corner of the Forest, his front feet well apart, his head on one side, and thought about things. Sometimes he thought sadly to himself, "Why?" and sometimes he thought, "Wherefore?" and sometimes he thought, "Inasmuch as which?" and sometimes he didn't quite know what he was thinking about. So when Winnie-the-Pooh came stumping along, Eeyore was very glad to be able to stop thinking for a little, in order to say, "How do you do" in a gloomy manner to him.

"And how are you? said Winnie-the-Pooh.

Eeyore shook his head from side to side.

"Not very how," he said. "I don't seem to have felt at all how for a long time."

Well, neither have I, Susan, felt very "how for a long time," but at least I've got a good friend to stick by my side.

I have to share with you a generous paraphrase of the Bible that I received this week while I was in the midst of "enema struggles."

Psalm 110:1 “The doctor said to my doctor, sit right there on the pot until I make your enemas your footstool.”

Sorry, no deeper thoughts than that today. I'm in need of another nap. "Oh, bother!"

A Message for Gray Days

One can't much complain of gray days in Costa Rica. Today could be called one, but the brilliant green surrounding me everywhere makes up for the minimal gray sky.

Yet, days can be gray. My days are not brilliant. But, I refuse to have them be gray.

For one, I've napped half the day. How much do you envy me THAT?!?

For another, I got to attend (albeit 10 minutes) the farewell for dear Tico friends leaving to join a team in Venezuela involved in training, investing in, and raising up youth leaders in that country. I have especially enjoyed a precious friendship with Adriana, so saying farewell to her was not easy, yet at the same time a joy.

Another bright spot are moments alone with my Lord. I cannot boast of praying a lot. Who can?

Here's something I read today:

The men who have most fully illustrated Christ in their character, and have most powerfully affected the world for him, have been men who spent so much time with God as to make it a notable feature of their lives. Charles Simeon devoted the hours from four till eight in the morning to God. Mr. Wesley spent two hours daily in prayer. He began at four in the morning. Of him, one who knew him well wrote: "He thought prayer to be more his business than anything else, and I have seen him come out of his closet with a serenity of face next to shining."

Luther said, "If I fail to spend two hours in prayer each morning, the devil gets the victory through the day. I have so much business I cannot get on without spending three hours daily in prayer."

Some sleepless nights I get close to two hours of prayer, but it's pretty "dozey prayer!"

Today I was reading another AJ Gossip sermon entitled, "A Message for Gray Days." My motto adopted from the reading:

May I infect those around me with an unconcerned and quiet faith, a faith that never dreams of doubting Him!

Glorify Him with me today if you are having a "Gray Day!"

ABC's of Recent Experiences in my Life

AJ Gossip - Oh, how much I have learned from his sermons in times of painful crisis!

Beckham Barking - Real life goes on and the neighbor's dog still awakes us at night

Chocolate Milk - It's so good in Costa Rica, isn't it Chris? Come down and try it sometime, everyone! Since I choke on water here and lately it tastes like cigarette butts thrown in a Coke can, I've been drinking a lot of chocolate milk. (I wouldn't know butts in a Coke can, but that sounds pretty awful!)

Dysfunction of all kinds

Efficiency - Woody and Kari (and others on the team) have had to gear up to create a system that allows me to be well-cared for, yet stay on top of important ministry issues

Fighting off pains I'd never dreamed of

Garage bags can find very creative uses!

Hallitosis Usually my own!

Ideas While vomiting for three solid hours in the hospital, they tried every drug they could think of plus the nurses' brought me cotton balls soaked in alcohol. I wasn't sure quite what to do with them, but I sniffed them, just in case. (They didn't work, either!)

Jonathan Bird - We have never seen this bird, but it makes a fascinating chirp in the night and early AM. We named it after our grandson, because for a while Jonathan made a sound like that bird. I really like the Jonathan bird. (I really like Jonathan Ophus, too!)

Kathryn and Tascha Kieft. Our "nieces" who have joined ITeams stayed with us several days before they began to study Spanish in prep for going to Ecuador. You know you have to love nieces. You have no choice. If I had to choose, these two would hit the top of my list!

Lindsay and Chino - I cried over missing their wedding, but I am glad Woody got to go.

Morphine anyone? I get it regularly slow-release by mouth. I does no miracles. But, IT HELPS!

Night Nurse - We were able to hire one for 5 nights a week to help me and take the weight at night off Woody and Kari, allowing them to rest. What a help that's been, and the insurance company might actually pay for her salary! ($200 for 60 hours. Hmm... isn't that a little over $3 an hour??) It's a ministry opportunity as well. (Ask me about it!)

Out of Order (Me!) I feel like I am good for almost nothing. (Feel free to argue with me!) Typing takes me hours. This update, for example! I make tons of mistakes I'm constantly correcting. Like on this entry, I accidentally wrote, "I am goof for almost nothing."

Precious, precious, presence of Christ in our lives

Quiroga family continues to mean the world to us as they minister in Cochabamba, Bolivia and as our daughter Norma and her family Howard, Natatasha (who just turned 12!!!) and Adrian just re-joined them. Quirogas sent me an Eeyore stuffed animal and Eeyore and I are almost inseperable. Our eyes droop almost identically!

Rockford Files - Our taste in evening rerun shows indicate what a low level we have dropped to in trying to distract me during painful evenings.

Sleeping in the living room. There's no shower downstairs in our house. For a while we used Gustafsons' kiddie pool on the kitchen floor for a creative shower option! I'm able now to climb upstairs to shower once a day, sitting on a yard chair in the shower. Yay!

Tapioca is a GREAT medicine chaser. This idea is worth marketing!

Undergo - Just learned I must undergo some blood tests. We were JUST at the clinic (a long, painful trek) and now we'll have to return for bloodwork! Oh, phooey!

Versatis Patch- A new, creative medical idea I'm using. I wonder if it really works! It's a Lidocaine patch that is absorbed into the root nerve area that is most affected, causing pain.

Woody - Along with Kari, are my angels. They have become A#1 nurses! They both give shots, coordinate medicines, position me in bed, and do other tasks only nurses don't give a second thought about.

X-rays - Did you ever think about how HEAVY x-ray images are? If we have to take all my films, we'll have to be careful about the weight limit on our luggage!

Yarn - If only I could get enough focus to dive back in to a crochet project I'd really begun to enjoy in June!!

Zest- O, God, give me a zest for life, even when life seems pretty wretched. "Be merciful to me, Lord, for I am faint,; O Lord heal me, for my bones are in agony. My soul is in anguish. The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayers." Psalm 6:2,9

Drab, Dull, Empty vs. Gleaming

What does it mean to be a true disciple? We talk and teach about this ALL the time. We choose to do that because JESUS did it!

Jesus seemed unable to keep out of other people's troubles. He grew tired carrying strangers' business. He was thankful to talk to people we would have thought rather impertinent.

My new favorite, AJ Gossip, wrote, "We know that that is life, real life, life as it should be lived. An yet we are not imitating it, not much, not closely, not where it would pinch. We can't be bothered; the cost is too heavy; always we keep slipping back into that old stupid fallacy that it is our life and, of course, intended primarily to be spent upon ourselves, and that those other people are a nuisance and an intrusion."

Browning would have called this life one that is drab and dull and empty business.

On the other hand, he DID say, "Only here or there will your eyes light on something that gleams out."

Oh, my! Which side of the discipleship fence do you sit on? And I? Drab, dull and empty vs. gleaming. Let's take a moment to think.

COS (Is that how you say "change of subject" nowadays?) I'm learning more about Tarlov cysts. I'll give you a fact a day.

TARLOV CYST FACT OF THE DAY: These several cysts I have in my sacrum hav probably eroded away more than ONE SQUARE INCH of my sacral report.